Since we’re all human here I’m just going to go ahead a ‘fess up.’ Even though I’m a Christian, I still find myself mad and angry sometimes. Once I’ve settled down, I then find myself ashamed of my actions during those moments, how I’ve let emotions take over and how I’ve let my mouth run, without checking up before I speak.
There – I said it and it’s a truth laid out for today.
I think a lot about how people expect Christians to be perfect and how perfection isn’t attainable. I’m beginning to see that as I try walking closer to God, even I expect a huge difference out of myself every day and find myself disappointed when I make mistakes.
I also see that the more I try to draw near to the Lord, the enemy attacks me more and more and tries to pull me away.
It’s a vicious cycle.
Yesterday was a rough day that had been amplified by a rough week. I let circumstances overwhelm me and in turn, grate on my nerves. In my weakness, the enemy crept in from every angle with his fiery darts and before I knew it, I allowed myself to just be mad for a while. That was exactly what the enemy wanted.
My husband reminded me of the quote “he who angers you, controls you” but there’s another version of that, that says “he who angers you, CONQUERS you.”
That hit me like a ton of bricks and I thought about it for the rest of the evening.
In Colossians 3 we’re taught “But now you must also rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips” and told how we’re to put off our old selves.
As I thought about the quote above, God reminded me of this verse and I was overwhelmed once more; this time with remorse on how I had carried myself. All I could do was pray and seek forgiveness from God and my family and ask God to fight the battle I was facing.
Anger is from the enemy and if it’s true, “he who angers you, controls you” then I’ve messed up.
I don’t want to allow the enemy to control any facet of my being. I belong to the King of Kings and I want Him to rule in my world. I want HIS character traits, the fruits of the Spirit, to be what comes from me. I fail, especially when the enemy is attacking and fighting hard to pull me away.
Nobody ever said the Christianity walk was easy. It’s a challenge to get things right because of the flesh. I’m thankful that God knows I fail, that He convicts me and then forgives me, and that if I ask, He will deliver me from things that make me less like Him.
He also knows that I’m never going to be perfect and He isn’t expecting that of me. He does, however, expect me to be different.
I will continue to strive for change from myself. I will remember that mistakes happen and I will remember that I belong to a loving God who will never forsake me because I’m seeking Him.
Now I ask you; “who controls you?”
Colossians 3:8 But now you must also rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips.
Ephesians 4:25-32 Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to your neighbor, for we are all members of one body. 26 “In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, 27 and do not give the devil a foothold. 28 Anyone who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with their own hands,that they may have something to share with those in need. 29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. 30 And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God,with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. 31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. 32 Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
Psalm 141:3 Set a guard over my mouth, LORD; keep watch over the door of my lips.